People often ask me how long it takes me to train my horses. I don’t really have an answer to that question. Over the years, as I have come to understand more about my horses, I no longer consider that I “train” them. To me training implies that I give my horse a specific set of instructions and he must respond automatically in a correct manner.
What I try to do instead is to develop both a relationship and a conversation with my horse. Horses are quite intelligent and very capable of independent thought. I ask them questions and make polite requests in a manner they can understand and together we solve problems and make decisions in order to reach our goal.
To me traditional horse training is similar to command style teaching, which is still, unfortunately, the foundation of our educational system. Command style teaching is an effective way to teach certain functional skills but it does not address the issue of critical thinking.
Without the ability to take that first step, make independent decisions and choices and judge what is right, wrong or appropriate in specific situations we would not be able to use functional skills in a useful way to live meaningful productive lives.
Teaching someone a functional skill such as how to put their shoes is usually done through command style teaching. “ Here is step one through nine. Follow the steps as I give them to you. With much repetition and memorization you will be able to successfully tie your shoes.” But once a person has learned to tie their shoes it is just as important that they are able to decide where and when it would be appropriate to wear those particular shoes.
Learning critical thinking skills is difficult for many children (and some adults too for that matter!). Children with special needs are often visual or kinesthetic learners. They rely on concrete facts and experiences for success in learning. Abstract thinking and problem solving can be difficult– but not impossible given the right support and encouragement:
1. Be a Coach
You cannot teach someone to take independent action, make decisions, or solve problems in 9 structured steps. Learning happens in the moment and people need ongoing support and feedback. Successful coaching is about having a relationship and an ongoing conversation rather than dictating instructions from a position of formal authority.
2. Ask, don’t tell
Telling someone what to do never engages or empowers them. Asking people questions enables them to make choices while encouraging them to look for possible solutions. And if we take the time to really listen to someone’s answers we actually learn more about them and the support and encouragement they specifically need from us.
Answering questions can be a very challenging skill. When learning any new skill, it is best to break the process into small incremental steps. Start with really simple direct questions to build up a comfort level and provide some success. Then progress slowly up to more general open-ended inquiries.
3. Practice
Asking and answering questions takes a lot of practice on both sides. Practice is most effective when there are no time constraints or pressures and everyone is in a relaxed state.
4. Recognize and acknowledge effort.
Imagine that you were trying to learn how to hit a tennis ball or a golf ball for the first time. Think about how would you feel if every time you missed the stroke your coach declared “No, that’s wrong!” It would be very discouraging. In the beginning we have to recognize and reward the honest effort. “That was a good effort” will go a long way to encourage independence and risk taking.
5. Have expectations
Let’s be honest. People often don’t ask questions of children with special needs because they don’t expect them to have answers. There are even fewer expectations if the child is non-verbal. Our children are intelligent and capable. It might take time, patience and effort on everyone’s part but they can succeed and in fact they will often surpass expectations. No one has the right to put a limit on anyone’s potential to achieve.
6. Let them struggle
We all learn from our mistakes and by struggling to overcome challenges. Our children don’t need to be rescued when they can’t come up with an answer or a solution right away. If we are always stepping in to save them we are telling them we don’t believe in their ability to succeed. They need to experience and understand for themselves that their solution may not be the right one and they need to look for an alternative.
7. Use your own creative thinking skills
A well-known horse trainer is always saying, “if your horse doesn’t give you the right answer then you either asked the wrong question or asked the question the wrong way. That same principle applies to people also
